Written and photographs supplied by Natascha Erasmus
Back in 2015, I stumbled across a photo of a lonely little brown dog sitting on the side of the road next to his bed. A pile of food and a water bowl had been left on the ground. It was clear someone had abandoned him there.
He looked so scared and confused. You could feel his sadness through that photo. The response to his photo was overwhelming. So many people felt like I did - heartbroken and outraged that anyone could dump him like that. I wasn't even looking to adopt at the time, but something about his sweet little face tugged at the deepest corners of my heart and made me send an email to apply, as I felt an overwhelming need to make sure he never knew rejection and abandonment again.
Tjokkie on my mind
After sending my application, I didn't hear anything for two weeks. I assumed he had found a home as the interest in him on social media was huge. After two weeks I got a phone call from the wonderful people at Wollies Animal Project asking me if I would still be interested in Tjokkie. I couldn't believe it! I immediately said yes and arranged for a home inspection the next day.
Once the home inspection was completed, I arranged with my boss to take the following afternoon off so that I could drive to Pretoria (I was living in Fourways at the time). That following afternoon, I arrived at Wollies and met Tjokkie for the first time. They put him in my arms, and that is where he stayed until we left. He was still very scared and unsure, so on the way home, I went past McDonald's and got him some chicken nuggets as an icebreaker between us.
Perfect in every way
It didn't take long for his personality to shine through. He is the sweetest, kindest, most loving, and playful little boy. It was as if I had won the lottery the day he became mine.
The people at Wollies estimated that he was about a year old. I don't know what happened in that first year of his life, but he did not like sudden loud noises. I remember one day, I was struggling to close a drawer. It was a little bit stuck. I pushed it hard, and suddenly, it closed with more force than I had intended. The loud bang it made when it closed sent Tjokkie running out of the house. I thought he had just got a fright, but when he didn't come back inside, I went looking for him. He was in the corner of the garden, crouched and shivering. He was so scared. From then on, I tried to be mindful around him with noise. As his trust in me grew, so he got better with noises.
I will never, for as long as I live, be able to understand how anyone could ever look at this beautiful, gentle, and sweet little dog and throw him away. He was perfect in every single way.
Tjokkie was like my shadow. Where I went, he followed. At night, he slept in my bed. His favourite spot was on my two spare pillows next to my head. Tjokkie loves stuffed toys, but unlike other dogs, he didn’t destroy them. He gave his toys love nibbles. Tjokkie always let me know when it was breakfast or dinner time. He would come and sit and stare at me intensely, occasionally licking his lips. When it came to giving him his dinner, he did a little happy dance where he jumped up onto his two back legs and then wiggle-danced until his bowl was put down. He sure did love his food. Of course, if we were eating anything delicious, he would come sit in front of us, upright like a meerkat. He was the king of our household.
8 beautiful years
Whenever I cried, Tjokkie would lick my tears. When I was sick in bed with the flu, he wouldn't leave my side, his food had to be brought to my room, because he wouldn't leave me. For 8 years, he was my guardian and my best friend, one of the great loves of my life.
Last year, on 11 September, after a few months of illness and not responding to treatment, I had to make the devastating decision to let him go over the rainbow bridge. His ashes live in my room, next to a candle I light for him. For the first few weeks after he was gone, I could still hear him, the little noises he would make when he was around or trying to get my attention, I don't hear them anymore, but I wish I could. I would give anything for one more day with my little Tjok man.
Recently, people have started sharing his original post on Facebook again, which is a bittersweet roller-coaster for me. On the one hand, my grief is still raw, and my heart misses him desperately. On the other hand is a beautiful reminder of our journey, of how absolutely blessed and lucky I am to have been able to spend 8 beautiful years with Tjokkie in my life. I will never stop wishing we had more time, but I am humbly grateful for the privilege of loving Tjokkie while he was part of our family.
